St. Margaret of Scotland

X-mas has come and gone and not a minute too soon. The holiday makes people stupid. Everything seems to be moving at breakneck speeds and everyone starts taking meth just to keep up.  Needless to say it really annoys me in almost every way. Everyone always says that people act uncharacteristically vicious in their shopping / interpersonal behaviors around the holidays, but I think it’s the total opposite.  I think it’s this Christmas frenzy that drove us to win out over the rest of god’s creatures as well as other competing versions of ape and come to dominate the earth.  Christmas is kind of like a celebration of evolution if you will.  While a complete contradiction from the start, it is funny simply to observe the way religious apes act while in competition for the fleeting Christmas resources.  It’s like survival of the fittest in the shopping malls and electronics stores, only the most perfectly adapted modern human being rewarded with a full and satisfied shopping cart.  Only the strong survive in the churches, giving becoming the temporary capitalist value to define the best consumer. Brutality, ruthless competition, and utter savagery are the keystones to finding that perfect gift – the one that will demonstrate to everyone how generous and beneficent you really are.  How thoughtful your father is for cutting me off on the freeway then flipping me the bird, how caring your mother is for stealing my parking space while screaming obscenities at the top of her lungs.  Thanks so much for shoving me full power so that you would be first in line as the stores open.  Its dog eat dog in every sense of the phrase.  Another funny fact is that more and more Christmas is being alienated from Christianity.  I mean, I know, more American’s believe in creationism over evolution – there’s no accounting for intelligence, but that even makes it stranger.  Not only are Christians acting un-Christian, but I see Jews and Muslims out buying up a storm as well.  I wonder if it’s a social pressure that causes people to act contrary to their religion in the struggle for acceptance, or if it’s just because you have no self worth without an iPod or HDTV.  Hard to say for sure.  In any event, I am not a fan of this holiday and I am more than happy to see it go the way of the Dodo.

I did meet up with some old high school friends a few days ago.  We hit up a macrobiotic restaurant in L.A. (which has nothing to do with bacteria as I mistakenly assumed) then pounded a few beers at Patsy’s in Laguna Niguel.  I have to admit that despite the extremely negative experience I recently had regarding Karaoke that I powered through this and engaged in some frolicking good times at the bar.  One of my friends brought an old yearbook, which I had never seen due to being kicked out my senior year, and it was like a memory avalanche.  Strangely familiar faces haunted every page (including my own), and yet I was unable to put names and events to all the emotions that ran through my brain.  I wish I had that damn yearbook because I would scan a bunch of them shits and have them up here for all to mock, regardless it was cool just to see it.  The most satisfying thing about the mini reunion was the sense of validation that it created in me.  I mean, I was here with all the old misfits and outcasts – the untouchables in the small private school society that we all used to be part of, and only now could I see that we were the only ones with true vision.  I mean, I always knew it but now it was just 100% certain. We were the uber-achievers, we were the visionaries, we were the sane ones – and this sanity was only expressed through our craziness in school.  We were raging against the cage that they tried to keep us in, and they tried to define us by our transgressions of the norm – ostracize us, alienate us, judge us.  It’s just funny to have the maturity and intelligence to look back and see all the bullshit for what it really was.  I’m proud to say I’m a misfit, I’m proud that I rebelled and resisted and acted out against the insanity of the norm.  Fuck those people and their bullshit values.  Fuck those people and their bullshit rules.  Fuck those people and their tyrannical ideologies and tenuous sense of their own self worth.  Fuck those people and their stupidity.  They were cattle, plastic robots marching in neatly defined lines.  They were pubescent zombies mindlessly groping after whatever the television told them to hunger for.  Haha!! I love it.  I was right all along!  The price of my freedom was high in those days, I was an angry, hurt, and marginalized young man…  I made many mistakes and suffered deeply, but it was worth it.  And not despite the pain but because of it.  My strife was proof that I was still alive inside.  The fire may have been dampened at times, but it was never extinguished.

So in closing;

FUCK YOU ST. MARGARET’S HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hahaahaaaaaaa!

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