Comments on: I Hate Whole Foods

By: S.Ler.

S.Ler. — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 06:00:09 +0000

Can I just say this made me cry! I was laughing so hard at every single word you have written! I swear this was me wrtting this article. You mentioned everything I bitch about everyday! LOL! I work at Whole Foods. A relative got me a job there. I know the type of people that shop and work there, but before then, I was very tolerent of every type of person. Not anymore. You’re almond butter story? Classic. This doesn’t surprise me one bit…even though it was hilarious! This type of thing happens every..single…day, serveral times a day. I swear organic food makes shit for brains.
I wear leather. I hunt deer. No, I’m not a lesbian for riding bullet bikes. I snowmobile. I have dead animals hanging on my walls at home. My husband lets his semi idol in our driveway. We have a 58 Edsel that dumps smoke…no..I’m not fixing it. It’s funny! I drive a Civic, proudly not made in America. We have3 old trucks dripping oil like crazy, right into the dirt. I have an anti Obama sticker on my car. And a “trees are fror traction, not for huggin” snowmobiling sticker on my car just to bug everyone who parks by me! I don’t believe in gay marriage. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t smoke weed. I don’t do cocaine in the break room. I don’t brew my own beer or kombucha in a shitty apartment kitchen. I live with my husband in my own house, not a downtown shack for a house shared with 6 other rock climbing buddies. I am the absolute opposite of everyone who shops and works there. I hate politics. I just don’t give a shit. All I know is I’m not a fucking democrat. Just because I work at Whole Foods stuck behind a counter checking your groceries, doesn’t mean I’m there for you to give your inouguration. Just because I have brown skin (Hawaiian), doesn’t make me african american, and doesn’t automatically mean I like obama. And NO! Just because I’m Hawaiian doesn’t mean I’m FROM Hawaii, so don’t assume I miss the beach, you “open minded” fuck! Man I swear the people who shop there! They claim to be lovers and understand of everything and different cultures, but they don’t know jack shit! I’m not Mexican either!
My question is, Why is it you keep buying all this healthy food and supplementswhen you’re on your third round of breast cancer? Treating it naturally obviously isn’t working. Go to a real doctor because I can’t stand hearing about it anymore!
People there are nuts! They’re obsessive over their food, which can only mean a strange personality to back it up. Just today, we didn’t have any organic blueberries. I went to the back and check myself. They produce guy said they’re coming tomorrow. I told the guy and he yelled at me for not having any blueberries! “(insert store i’ve never heard of) would never do this! They always have what I need!” I then told him, “We’ll have some tomorrow morning.” He then proceeded to yell at me at the top of his lungs, “I DON’T WANT THEM TOMORROW, I WANT THEM NOW!!” I walked away. I wasn’t going to put up with his shit. The things you get yelled at for are so stupid! We get the wierdest people in this store!
We had a lady cry over running out of chicken. It was an incredible sale and it was gone within 3 hours of the store opening. There was a sign still up somewhere in the store and she was frantically looking for the chicken. When we told her we accidentally missed taking down a sign, she started crying. Like the huffy puffy, bottom lip upset little kid cry. “You shouldn’t lie to your customers. It’s very wrong!* gasp gasp sniff sniff* She then wiped her gator tears away when my manager slapped a big thing of chicken on the counter and said you can have this.
One time we were out of organic potato chips, so a customer thought. Then a lady yelled at me for that saying how horrible I AM for not keeping stuff in stock. I do it just to get people to come back and buy more (I am a cashier. She doesn’t know that I was assisting another cashier with bagging and I don’t work in grocery.) The chips were right there in front of her botox ridden face. “Oh!” No apology. Nothing.
I’ve worked in customer service for years and this is the absolutely worst place I’ve experienced.
Whole Foods drives me crazy enough to the point that I can’t even keep my thoughts together to make a post like this! LOL!
I could go on and on. But I won’t. I’ll save it for a blog when I finally quit.

By: Danny Z.

Danny Z. — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 06:30:15 +0000

If you don’t like Whole Foods, then you should check out this video of a guy defiling a Whole Foods delivery van lol: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_cqPm308_M

By: Elsa

Elsa — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 22:48:56 +0000

I love this story! I shy away from calling myself a vegetarian because of all of the asshole freaks like “Health Hag”. Next time give her all the curse words you can think of linked together…then claim you have terets.

By: r

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 15:37:22 +0000

lol. Yea it got pretty crazy in there at times, thats why i had to quit. Just to throw out a little coincidence, I also CrossFit as well lmao. Great article though, no complaints over here. Keep it coming MEATGRINDER!

By: MEATGRINDER

MEATGRINDER — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 02:11:41 +0000

Holy Shit! An actual Whole Foods employee! Fuck me, I can’t even imagine the weirdos and annoying shit you’d have to deal with in that place. If most of the people working there weren’t all granola we wouldn’t even know what “going postal” meant.

By: r

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 17:57:59 +0000

haha. definitely a great article. i worked at a Whole Foods for a couple of months and have experienced some of the WORST customers you can only imagine. I worked in that kickass salad/sandwich department you mentioned. Not a bad gig over there- employees get 20% discount on everything. But still, too damm expensive in the long run. Thanks for the laugh, this was great!

By: Marcella

Marcella — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 09:26:05 +0000

I’m dying…this is hilarious! I still call it Whole Dudes too….funny shit

By: Eveille

Eveille — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 00:06:49 +0000

Ha! So I just got back from Whole Foods. I love the place, the produce is delicious, and the food is great. But I was reminded of your post as I waited in line to purchase my stuff. So I’m waiting in line and I have maybe 6 items when a lady in her 50′s asks to cut in front of me because she only has 3 items. Ok, so I kinda look a her funny, but since she’s old I’m like,”ok sure”. So not only seconds after this happens an old dude behind me decides that he does not like the the way that I put my produce on the conveyor belt and steps around me to reposition all my stuff the way he feels it should be positioned; pushing it closer to the cash register. I stare him down, because I don’t like strangers touching my food, and he’s like, ” Oh sorry, I guess I’m just particular”. Oooookaaaayy???? WTF!!!!!Fucking patrons at whole foods are on goddamn organic vegan whole food sprouted crack!!!