Movie making is a completely new experience for me.  Its was like total chaos for 5 days straight.  People running around like crazy, nobody seemingly in charge of anything, almost like they put a hundred people in a room with a hundred different jobs and somehow a movie is what came out.  I couldn’t get enought out of the way.  I was constantly moving from one place to another looking for shade and quiet to chill out for the hours upon hours that they had absolutely no use for me.  Craft Services is another mysterious temptation.  These guys are brought in to provide food to the cast/crew and they keep these table jam-packed with the best catering in the whole city.  They are merely the middle men and I’m sure they are making bank but you gotta hand it to them because they will put pounds on you.

So aside from getting fat and lazy for a whole week I got to embrace my inner muslim terrorist at costume and make-up every morning.  You guessed it, irony strikes again.  After doing my very best to slaughter every last one of them of the face of the earth for the past many years I am now playing a muslim terrorist in a fucking movie.

The coolest part was shooting a 50 cal loaded with blanks from the back of a pickup truck.  The thing that I can be most proud of is when I get to pay 15 dollars and see this fucking movie and then point out with pride “hey, there I am dad, running away like a coward”.  Haha.. fuck it.. me no care.

I got a little word of wisdom for those people who just sit there and look for flaws and goofs and incongruencies in movies GIVE IT UP!!!

Movies are nothing but flaws and fuck-ups.  The whole thing is like the first best idea that some college intern with no clue came up with in like 2 seconds of thought.  There is no master plan, there is no quality control, its just “hey, ok, do this shit, great – done”.

I got another gripe… PG-13 !?!?!?!?  A fucking PG-13 movie!?!??!  I guess I can understand it, Marvel went for the money.  This is their first motion picture and they wanted it to be as accessable as possible.  I just think its selling out a little bit to have one of the coolest and most flawed superheroes of all time – Tony Stark – a man captured by gooks, tortured, forced into labor to make weapons for the commies.  A man who used his genius to free himself and yet carries with him the horrors of his captivity.  A complete alcoholic, womanizing, billionaire playboy (great casting by picking Robert Downey Jr. by the way).  And the fucking guy takes time out of his busy assault to save a little haji boy and his fucking puppy!?!??!?

BULLSHIT

BULLSHIT

BULLSHIT

and it pisses me off.  Iron man should fucking stomp the boy and the puppy.  Squash their bloody bones into the dirt.

Stark’s personality was based of Howard Hughes according to Stan Lee, and I’ll even quote “Howard Hughes was one of the most colorful men of our time. He was an inventor, an adventurer, a multi-millionaire, a ladies man and finally a nutcase.”

So maybe they modernized it up.  Original Iron man got captured by vietnamese and now maybe haji’s.  So I got no problem with a movie that extols the greatness and good neighborly concern of rounding up all the haji’s and exterminating them.  It just bugs me when Hollywood destroys something that was once pure and good.

Its like they do a thousand sequels to everything these days from guitars to comic books.  They can’t just let something alone.  They can’t just leave something be the best it can be and move on.  And they continue to change and modify until the newest version is unrecognizable next to the original article.  Outrage.

So one good thing did come out of this week.  My buddy Igor and I came up with a new phrase that epitomizes the utter embracing of our inner shitbag on the set:  when we were sitting there bored off our asses for hours and hours, constantly being told to ‘get ready right now’ and then ‘never mind’ – the old spin up spin down scenario.  We eventually would completely give up, and the singular act that would express this admission of defeat was.

take off your boots completely and “make it official”.

Not much, I’ll admit, but aside from a never ending buffet and a million Sudoku games it was all we had.