Wild Turkey

Well its Thanksgiving again. Another holiday that slides right through me like a sickness. I kind of thought that when I got out of the teams that I would be around for all the bullshit I had missed out on in the military, all the together stuff, the human stuff, all the ceremony. Of course I was totally wrong but its starting not to bother me as much and that is what is really kinda scary. Its like when you were a kid and a year seemed to last forever and it took painful eternities before you would turn 8 or 9 because you had such a narrow frame of reference and most of that time you were suckin tit and had no clue what the hell was going on anyway, but now the years just fall away with nothing to show for and you don’t even feel it. I can’t really remember the last time I was home for any holiday, let alone a Thanksgiving. Anyway, there are a few things that I am thankful for, I will list them here:

Happy Thanksgiving Thankful List 2004:

- I am not dead

- I can appreciate that I am not dead

Noah and I had our Thanksgiving dinner at the chow hall of the damned (or whatever you wanna call that place that really creeped us out the last time we went). Dinner was ok I guess, really just a slap in the face to being home and able to do what you want to for the holiday. I honestly kinda don’t like the whole big deal about Thanksgiving and other such occasions. I mean I like seeing family and friends, like eating until I want to puke, and like goofing around all day and hearing the same tired jokes year after year but it just all seems a little overwhelming at times. I think I kinda like creating my own traditions instead of trying to make everything live up to some Norman Rockwell image of what some holiday is supposed to be. One reason is probably that because my folks are divorced that I have to live and then re-live each holiday with each person. The whole time each side subtly tries to program their little attacks into me as an unwitting and innocent messenger for the other side (although it is totally transparent and really just kind of sickens me). Second, I don’t think Im really all about big fancy productions. I think I much rather prefer a nice quiet comfortable meal with a few people over the huge circus that always seems to surround a thanksgiving dinner. I hate laughing at shit that isn’t funny. I also hate pretending to like stuff that I have no interest in or actually think sucks. Ok, Im getting totally Holden Caufield here.. chill dog! I have thought about just telling everyone that even though I may be in town for a certain holiday that I am choosing not to celebrate it with anyone and just go do something different on my own instead. I definitely would have to ride out the passive-aggressive and guilt factor laid down by my parents. All the ‘we understand that you are choosing not to be with us for the holiday but you are in our thoughts and we would love it if you were there’ and ‘we had a great time, everyone asked about you and we all missed you very much’. Like Im some kind of pok-e-mon that some kid has to have for their collection or it just wont be the same, more an accessory to be admired than an actual thinking being. So maybe this all sounds a little dire, well its probably not as bad as it sounds. I used to go bowling every thanksgiving, well at least i did 3 years in a row until something or other happened and the chain was broken. I used to enjoy the shit out of that. It was kinda thanksgiving-esque too because if you get 3 strikes in a row thats like a turkey.. or whatever.. anyway I can definately remember being drunk a few x-mases (or is it x-mi?) in a row but I don’t think you can call that really a tradition. Maybe I am just a miserable bastard.

So Noah and I spent the rest of our evening driving around from one military checkpoint to the next giving beers to all the guys standing out in the cold. Yeah, it went from blast furnace hot to 30′s and 40′s at night around here in like a week. Told the dudes, ‘thanks’ and ‘happy thanksgiving’ and stuff like that. Some guys were pretty appriciative but other were just like ‘yeah, whatever, fuck off’. Well we gave the beers out nonetheless. We had to smuggle the shit out of camp. Even though liquor is easy for us to get it would probably piss everyone off to find out that we were stealing the ‘thursday night bar-b-que’ beer supply to give to army dudes. Noah and I do not drink or in any way take part in the social gatherings here on camp and it would probably not go over well with the regulars that the two guys who don’t come to the parties stole the beer and gave it away. I figure that had I been drinking I would have at least consumed as much as we gave away tonight, plus our team is the ones who constantly gotta go get the shit for everyone so they kinda owe us in a way. Anyway, it wasn’t done with malice.. just trying to look out for some sorry motherfuckers who have it really fucking bad over here. It felt good to hook those guys up, we both felt it, it felt good to have a purpose other than just staying alive for a little while.

So… happy thanksgiving to everyone back in the states, hope you guys have an awesome holiday. I wish I were back there so we could all go bowling.

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